Thank You Queen Latifah

I've been mulling over this really great idea for a few days now - I think it would make a really interesting post. In fact, I sat down about 2 hours ago to write it, but I had to stop. I just wasn't feeling it. In fact, I was feeling pretty crappy. No, it's not because of the major cold and cough that we've all had for 2 weeks (although that *is* making me feel pretty crappy). It's because this day didn't end the way I wanted it to.

I had the day off from work, and Jasmine was here with the boys. I let her head out early today because it is Friday and because she is coming down with the cold that I *know* we gave her. She is never sick. Well, she *was* never sick - before meeting us, that is. So, I happily cleaned up the kitchen, put away the groceries and called my next door neighbor to arrange a front yard play-with-the-kids-impromptu-happy-hour as soon as the boys woke up from their nap. They usually wake up around 4, but at 4:30 they were still snoozing away - I guess still recovering from the crud. I got so anxious to see them that I sat with my iPhone in the chair in their room waiting for something to wake them up. When the phone finally rang, they slowly awakened, cute as can be. Then it all went wrong. The tears started. The NO DIAPER! NO TEE TEE POTTY! NO PANTS! NO MOMMY! started. I asked if they wanted to go outside....one did, one didn't. Foster didn't want to go outside. He didn't want a diaper. He didn't want a snack. He didn't want juice. He didn't want to go downstairs. And he DAMN sure didn't want me.

We managed socks, shoes, coats and hats and got outside where it was eventually happy again. Of course, the one who wanted to go out in the first place then decided he wanted to play everywhere he wasn't allowed to. I said, "this way"....he said "that way." I said, "No, THIS way"....he said, "Noooooooo......THAT way." He even did what my neighbor called "giving me the finger with his facial expression" that made me realize how MUCH of his father's son he actually is. It went on for about an hour, then we all went inside before we froze our fingers off. Dinner was relatively OK. Yancey's Mom was here to help (he is out of town for a couple days), and they were sort of well-behaved. Then, the wheels came off.

Bed Time. It just sucked. Crying, screaming, thrashing, refusing to have a diaper put on, refusing to brush teeth, asking for something then throwing it when he got it. I am specifically referring to Foster. I put him in his crib twice (which does involve zipping a crib tent, even more indignity) because I couldn't handle his tantrums. Each time he calmed down and came out sweetly. And then, something else set him off. I kept trying to remind myself that the boys are exhausted and don't feel well, but my patience was really nonexistent. Eventually, both boys were safely in bed, hopefully none the worse for wear. Not so much Mom. I tried to stay calm, but I am afraid that if you woke both boys up right now they would say, "Mom is mean."

So, that's where I was when I sat down to write a couple hours ago. I was really upset with myself. I mean, I watch SuperNanny....I read "Making The Terrible Twos Terrific"....I believe that kids are in need of boundaries, and if you let them get away with things, it hurts them in the long run....all that crap. But tonight, I am not proud of myself or the Mom that the boys saw. I was not in control at ALL. I am almost 4 DECADES older than they are, and not only did they run the show, but they made me feel like crap for letting them run the show. This shit is hard. And, not just because my husband is out of town. It's hard every day. But just when I was about to re-up on the ages old prescription for Prozac, I turned on the TV and flipped around. Next thing I know, I am totally engrossed in Beauty Shop, the awesome movie with Queen Latifah set in ATL about a - you guessed it - beauty shop. It's a sort of sequel to Barber Shop, the movie with Cedric the Entertainer and Ice Cube that I always thought was funny. In each movie, something happens and they almost lose the shop. Then they all band together, someone falls in love and the shop is saved. So simple, so heartening so mind numbing. And, as the credits rolled, I realized I felt better.

Don't get me wrong, I am totally going upstairs to stand in front of each crib and say my silent prayer/apology to those 2 little 2-year olds, but Queen Latifah saved me from doing it in tears. Now, I'm going to do it with a smile because doggone it, my shop is still open even though those little ankle-biters almost shut me down today!!!